Chemistry

The subject I used to love the most. I still, I think. But now I can't seem to understand the beauty of Physical Chemistry. It sucks being in a world of confusion all the time. I'm trying. It feels great if I can conquer the subject like I used to. Everything about it is in the back of my head. But alas, it is never the same.

Nevertheless, I still wish for an A. Who doesn't ? I need your prayers, my dear friends.

250812
Physical Chemistry Test 2
1600-1800

alhanasabrina

Future Chemical Engineer, InsyaAllah

Today, I Saw A Dog

For once, I was there, sobbing in the cold. Alone without no one in reach. Everything around me was pitch black and all I can hear is tiny droplets of water, trying to make a dent in a rock somewhere. I'll cheer for you, dear droplet, as it will take major perseverance and effort to form even a slightest effect on the rock. I am with a jacket, which by now was soaking wet from the water. I didn't know where I was, or who I really am, or how did I get there. I can't feel my hand, it's numb. Numbness embraced me and at that moment I swear I was closer to death. My mind kept struggling, if only I could remember. Not even tiny bits of pieces of what had happened, just blank. I remembered the episode of Vampire Diaries where they made the person's memory disappear and I wonder whether that had happened to me. The thought only last for a second as I brushed it away, shuddering. Vampires don't exist, whispered the thoughts in my head. I tried to wander around, only failing miserably by falling straight to the ground the moment that I stood up. My energy was close to empty and my limbs are failing me. I need more time. The attempt of shouting for help - even speaking, was hindered as a squeak can barely come out from my mouth. The pain was excruciating, not physically, but mentally as the three cynical words kept appearing in front of me, forming an echo, 'I don't remember, I don't remember, I don't remember'. As if it's laughing at me. Over and over again. My head is throbbing like a drum. Boom boom. Boom boom. Boom boom. Suddenly, there was light, blinding my eyes. That's all I could remember.

I am not very proud of myself today, even though now is just half of today. It must be reflex, but bad bad reflex. And I really shouldn't put sleep as my priority over certain things sometimes. It just gets over the limit. Sigh. I shall try my best for the remaining of today.

Forgive me, O' Allah : alhanasabrina

Look At My Notes Inside My iPhone, You'll Understand Better

O Allah, grant me my patience, for YOU are testing me. All this fears, all this heartbreak, it is just merely You testing me.

Maybe I don't deserve it, that's why I didn't get it, no matter how successful I am during that interview. Maybe this is the way of YOU showing me that.

Maybe this is just Allah's cue for me, to see. To see how long will I be able to stand beside Him, patiently as He brings down a mountain of problems onto my shoulder.

InsyaAllah, with YOUR help, I am able to get thru this.

alhanasabrina

but you can't, can you ? :)

Ambillah apa saja kecuali Nur

itu janji Adam. Adam redha.


Nobody will know the pain of losing someone you dearly love, your other half. In this movie, it is Aidil who felt the most pain. First, losing Nur to his brother. Then after being happy with his wife Aliya w their two kids, she is now also, gone. MashaAllah. Nothing can be compared to that pain. The flashbacks, the memories. Ya Allah. Let me be the one going thru that pain, if I were to get married. I wouldn't want my future husband to feel that excruciating pain.

Astaghfirullah.


alhanasabrina

Taken from lovedthee.blogspot.com

Jangan memberi harapan pada yang belum pasti,

kelak ada insan yang bakal dilukai,

Jangan menaruh harapan pada yang belum tentu dimiliki,

nanti hati yang kecewa sendiri.

Sebaliknya,

gantunglah segenap pengharapanmu kepada Yang Maha Memberi,

nescaya dirimu tak sesekali dizalimi,

kerana Dia mendengar pengharapanmu setiap kali & Dia menunaikannya dgn cara-Nya yang tersendiri

Cukup cintai dalam diam dari kejauhan dengan kesederhaan & keikhlasan

Kerana tiada yang tahu rencana Tuhan

mungkin saja rasa ini ujian yang akan melapuk atau membeku dengan perlahan

Kerana hati ini begitu mudah untuk dibolak-balikkan

serahkan rasa itu pada Yang Memberi dan Memilikinya

biarkan DIA yang mengatur semuanya hingga keindahan itu datang pada waktunya

"Barangsiapa yang menjaga kehormatan orang lain, pasti kehormatan dirinya akan terjaga."

(Umar Bin Khattab ra)

If you really love her, you won’t touch her.

Not even the slightest bit.

You’ll protect her dignity and sacredness as a muslimah.

Just hold her in your heart for a few more years ..

then you can do it the halal way

“Sesiapa sahaja yang memberi kerana Allah, menolak kerana Allah, mencintai kerana Allah,membenci kerana Allah & menikah kerana Allah, maka bererti ia telah sempurna imannya.”

(HR. Al-Hakim)

As a reminder because I find this interesting. InsyaAllah.

Hikmah

I think everything that had happened to me has it's own pros and cons. Well, one thing that I know of, i'm glad to still be here, in Malaysia. Close to my family and friends. A girl can dream. Who doesn't want to go overseas and study and make your parents and teachers proud ? But I think for now, UTP is my place. I can't bear the missing if I were to go overseas to study, miles away from everything I love except for Allah. He is ALWAYS there :) I know i'll cry. Even reading a post about goodbyes put tears to my eyes, what more if it were me ?

InsyaAllah, i'll go overseas to continue doing my masters. InsyaAllah by that time, i'll have someone special to accompany me :)


alhanasabrina

I would just like to say

Alhamdulillah

that I am born in Islam.

for being able to live, hear, see, walk, talk and breathe.

for still having my parents, beloved siblings and relatives.

for still being able to sleep in my own bed, have my own hot shower, and eat hot food.

for having a nice house to live in, a car to drive in, and sufficient money to spend with.

for getting a scholarship from MARA to study in Universiti Teknologi PETRONAS.

for I am still a Muslim, having sense to wear my hijab, can still recite the Quran, follow the 5 pillars of Islam and still learning to be better.

for all the good things that are happening in my life now, Alhamdulillah.


alhanasabrina

Strength

Those tears, they're a must. But I feel sinned :( I am glad, as I have end the story. It is to give chance for both of us to repent for what we have done, and change. InsyaAllah, really change towards the better future. Towards the one and only Allah s.w.t.

Ya Allah tolonglah hamba mu ini supaya beristiqamah dalam usaha untuk berubah ke arah mu. Aku sedar, dan aku perlukan hidayah darimu untuk lebih dekat kepada mu. Lembutkan lah hati ku Ya Allah. Terima lah doa doa ku Ya Allah dan ampunkan lah dosa dosa ku yang terdahulu Ya Allah.

slow and steady. slow and steady insyaAllah.

InsyaAllah, after this I will have the strength not to cry for anyone except for you Ya Allah. I am determine to be someone, to be a better muslimah in your eyes.

I am trying, I am trying. Ameen.

Heartbreak

I can imagine my life perfectly if I were to accept the offer. I'll be super duper happy, but...

I guess no further explanation is needed here.

I want to, but i can't.

alhanasabrina

Tricks Of A Woman

Football. It can bring you higher than ecstasy and take you lower to the depths of despair. And we are all bounded by that one magical word

gooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaal !

Tell me, who doesn't watch football ? :)

*inspired by that tv commercial

maxime

The title: It's a movie