For once, I was there, sobbing in the cold. Alone without no one in reach. Everything around me was pitch black and all I can hear is tiny droplets of water, trying to make a dent in a rock somewhere. I'll cheer for you, dear droplet, as it will take major perseverance and effort to form even a slightest effect on the rock. I am with a jacket, which by now was soaking wet from the water. I didn't know where I was, or who I really am, or how did I get there. I can't feel my hand, it's numb. Numbness embraced me and at that moment I swear I was closer to death. My mind kept struggling, if only I could remember. Not even tiny bits of pieces of what had happened, just blank. I remembered the episode of Vampire Diaries where they made the person's memory disappear and I wonder whether that had happened to me. The thought only last for a second as I brushed it away, shuddering. Vampires don't exist, whispered the thoughts in my head. I tried to wander around, only failing miserably by falling straight to the ground the moment that I stood up. My energy was close to empty and my limbs are failing me. I need more time. The attempt of shouting for help - even speaking, was hindered as a squeak can barely come out from my mouth. The pain was excruciating, not physically, but mentally as the three cynical words kept appearing in front of me, forming an echo, 'I don't remember, I don't remember, I don't remember'. As if it's laughing at me. Over and over again. My head is throbbing like a drum. Boom boom. Boom boom. Boom boom. Suddenly, there was light, blinding my eyes. That's all I could remember.
I am not very proud of myself today, even though now is just half of today. It must be reflex, but bad bad reflex. And I really shouldn't put sleep as my priority over certain things sometimes. It just gets over the limit. Sigh. I shall try my best for the remaining of today.
Forgive me, O' Allah : alhanasabrina
No comments:
Post a Comment